No Fear

It has been a very long time since I posted a blog or even wrote anything… I have come to this conclusion in recent weeks that bringing something to light helps you overcome the thing you’re struggling with… So here goes…

I find it ironic that I chose the name A Brave Adventure for my blog, when praying about what to name my blog I felt the Lord leading me to that name… it must have been a foreshadowing of His promises for me. One of the biggest things I have struggled with in my life has been fear. Fear on so many different levels in almost every area of my life. Fear of death, fear of living, fear surrounded me. Every corner I turned fear was there to greet me, every thought I have fear permeates it and attacks even the happiest of thoughts. About a month ago I went up to our home church Dwelling Place Christian Fellowship in Christiansburg,VA to receive some ministry in this area. I was in a place of desperation, I was completely done with the blatant attacks of the enemy, every single day. My thoughts would go something like this: “I’d like for my family to go on a cruise together… ‘What if you drop Ansley off the ship.’” Something as crazy as that would paralyze me, I could feel the emotion, the pain of it all. I would be going about my day and a picture of Anthony, Ansley or myself getting hurt would pop into my head and I would again be able to feel the pain and emotion that would come with an event like that. I would hold my breath and wait for it to pass. Those types of moments would come very often, in the beginning of this struggle these instances were very few and far between but as the struggle became more deeply rooted the attacks became so blatantly obvious; I knew who was attacking me, I knew whose actions brought on these thoughts. It was almost as if the enemy saw how vulnerable I was to fear, how easy it was to catch me in a fear trap that he just went to town. I got to this point where I was just completely fed up and over this fear, it was hindering my walk with the Lord, my relationship with my husband and daughter; it was keeping me in the dark hiding from life. I didn’t want to go out and live life because I was afraid of getting hurt, afraid of pain and afraid of loss, so in my fear of death I was also fearing life… what a terrible pit I was in. And in a moment of frustration and annoyance of my circumstances I chose to bring my struggle to the light, I was embarrassed and ashamed of the level of fear I was walking in. I had concluded in my heart that it was my struggle to deal with, I had gotten myself in this mess and I needed to get myself out of it. Which is a complete lie from the enemy. The Lord saw my struggle and the fear in my heart and yet He loved me the same. My sin, my struggle wasn’t to big for Him to bring healing to. He came to give me life and life abundantly. The fear I was walking in did not disqualify my from His love, His perfect love which casts out fear. After an intense weekend of ministry full of emotion and freedom I finally felt the fog lifting from my life, I could breathe a little easier and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel I had become so comfortable in. Fear was and is not my portion. It is still a day to day thing of renewing my mind and declaring truth in every situation and there are time when I get lazy and fear sneaks up on me and attacks with success but in each moment I know the Lord is faithful, I know He loves me and I know that His perfect love casts out fear. I know that nothing can separate me from the Love of Jesus. I just have to take each moment, each day as it comes. And with every passing day as I choose the love of Jesus, every day as I choose to live life and not hide in fear I come more and more out of the fog and the more and more I know that I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! I will live life as A Brave Adventurer!
If you are struggling with fear I encourage you to bring your fear to the light, the Lord is faithful, He will meet you where you are at and he will speak love to the areas of your heart and bring freedom and healing to your life.

Romans 8:38-39
“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, more powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

1 John 4:18
“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.”

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I choose Joy.

Choice. Such a small and simple word, but the weight that comes with it is enormous. It’s a small and big word. It’s the power of free will, we get to choose. We choose so many things through out life big things that impact not only ourselves but the people around us and sometimes people we don’t even know. We choose small and simple things that really only effect us like our hair color, the shirt we are going to where, or what we are going to have for lunch. But the big choices, that’s what I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. 
In the past a lot of choices were made that extremely effected me and the people around me, people I deeply love and care about. Those choices were made by people I trusted and looked up to. The effects of their choices changed lives, the perception and deceit from the enemy about those choices sent some people down a path that didn’t and won’t lead to The Lord. Those choices and events have been heavy on my heart. I can sit here and list the people and their choices and play the blame game. But in truth I am choosing to believe that those events were not Gods will for me or the group of people effected by the circumstances. Yes different choices could have been made, and a lot of people wouldn’t have been hurt or lead to believe the lies of the enemy and everything would have been dandy. But today I’m making the choice to forgive, the choice to reject the lies the enemy communicated to my heart, and break free from the chains that have bound me concerning those events. I choose to lay those people and their choices at the foot of cross because I know my God is just and faithful. I choose to let go of bitterness and take hold of the freedom The Lord has for me. I’m going to give my hurts to Jesus and I’m going to step out of the way so The Lord can work justly and righteously on my behalf. Today I choose to bless those who have hurt me. I choose the bind the freedom of The Lord to their lives, to bind the love of The Lord to their lives. 
I don’t want to find myself in a place of holding onto hurts and lies. I’ve laid so many things on the side of this road I’ve been walking, leaving them with Jesus and moving forward. But some times I seem to back track with out noticing it and when I do I see those things at the side of the road and the enemy tricks me into thinking that those things still belong to me. It’s so easy and sadly comfortable to pick up those hurts and stuff them somewhere to save for later. But The truth of the matter is those hurts were never really mine, Jesus paid the price for them when He died on the cross and defeated death. 
So today I choose freedom, joy and Jesus. Because in Him all things hold together. 
What will you choose today?

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A Question of Faith by Anna Latshaw

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A Question of Faith

Is it possible to trust in part?

Surely you are either trustworthy or you are not?

If you could let me down once,

Surely that would be reason for me to not trust you at all?

Am I in or am I out?

Will I have faith or will I doubt?

The choice is up to me.

On my faith you depend.

In the meantime time you remain,

The one in whom I can depend.

You are everything you say you are.

100% God, nothing less nothing more.

Wisdom chooses to trust, to launch fully,

On the one person in this life who cannot & will not lie.

To trust not in what is seen or results,

But on the evidence of who you are & always will be.

Faith is not based on circumstances.

It is not the absence of evil or pain.

It is in the reality of a faith worthy God!

Anna Latshaw

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Pursuit (Being Pursued by The Lord)

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What a crazy week it has been! I have been on jury duty for the past week! It is crazy to see the process of our justice system! Even crazier to have been taught about the Court Room of Heaven and the justice system of the Lord! Praise God that He is the final judge and that He is just!

But beyond all of the craziness of my time on a jury, I really felt the Lords pursuit of me this week. I was told that I would more then likely see some one I knew on the first day, however by the time I was placed in a panel and sent up with 3 groups of 12 people to be questioned by the lawyers and judge I had not encountered any one I remotely recognized. I wasn’t to worried though I really felt the Lord with me the whole week, especially that first day! But by the time the selection process was over and I was finally accepting the fact that the next 5 days of my life was going to be spent in court room and jury room with 12 people I didn’t know at all the Lord surprised me! I pulled out my IHOP (International House of Prayer) water bottle and a man to my right exclaimed: “ IHOP! I was just listening to Bickle last night!” I was shocked! I mean I expected to be amongst some believers (hopefully) but some one who knew IHOP was beyond my expectations.  As the day went on I think the 2nd day, we were talking about how the Lord speaks to us through dreams and I mentioned the internship we had gone through in Virginia, and how we had a dreams class taught by Jim and Mims Driscoll and again to my surprise he responds: “The people with Stir the Water? I’m on their email list!” Okay Lord now I am really blown away, I don’t think I could be any more surprised by this at all… 🙂 So again the day continues and I decided I would mention the church we are apart of, and invite him to come! Well I write all of the information down address, times ect and then I decide it would be a good idea to write down the names of the people whose house we meet at… Daniel and Ann Latshaw…. (This is where it gets crazy). As he reads the paper he looks up and says: Daniel Latshaw! I knew him and Anna before they got married! WHAT WHAT WHAT?! Ok Lord now you may be showing off just a little bit… Haha. The conversation of course continues on about how crazy this is and we list a few more people we both know and how cool the Lord is!

Turns out this world is very small, but our God is very big… Duh right?

I mean I guess I loose sight of that, I get so caught up in my day to day routine and when duty calls such as jury duty something my flesh, and the enemy would say is ordinary and not really involving the Lord, just something that everyone does. The Lord blows me away and shows me that He is apart of everything whether the world wants Him there or not. His presence is all around us and He is chasing after His children.

I felt that pursuit more then ever this week, not only did I meet a brother in Christ who knows several people I care deeply about, but He communicated and confirmed His promises that I may have slightly been doubting lately, ok definitely doubting through this person. Some one who truly knew nothing about me and Anthony or our walk and struggles recently. But the Lord communicated again what was told to me all last week by several people, His promises for me are yes and amen, He never changes, He is always the same. And His timing is completely perfect.

The Lord knew I was struggling, that I was having a hard time holding fast to the promises and words He has given us about the future and He chased after me like He always does to again in my doubt of His promise to confirm it again. To redirect my hope that had truly been differed. He helped me refocus my hope on the one thing it should be focused on and that is Him, not the promises, but the Promise giver.

I could just float in the peace and reassurances He has given me this week, a week full of listening to people argue the justice of the world, not the Lord. A week of listening to people possibly lying after putting their hand on the word of God and vowing not to, a week of an overload of information I could probably now recite in my sleep if asked to. And a day of 11 hours of deliberating what justice was in this situation. God was present and active in that jury room and court room wether the other jurors or people of the lawsuit and court cared or not.

What a God we serve, He is faithful, He is loving, He is just, He is the same yesterday today and tomorrow. His promises for us are yes and amen.

He is good!

I Can Feel the Rumbling…

(I’m waiting for the winds to change and as I wait will you strengthen me)
Like months before when I was hearing the soft but constant cadence of change coming I have been feeling a rumbling. The change has come I knew it was coming and when but I didn’t know what it would look like or what it would feel like. There has been a huge shift in our life in this move. As we step into this new season I feel the anticipation in my spirit for the things The Lord has in store for me and us, a stirring deep within me. I feel some of the things that I was ministered in welling up inside me and my spirit yearning to give the gift of freedom and forgiveness I was given while we were in Virginia. I feel my spirit calling out to Jesus, crying out for more of Him. More of Jesus in me, around me, through me and about me. For His presence to just permeate my every moment. The sweetness and love of His presence to just cover me. This rumbling of His presence is coming toward me like waves crashing on the shore. Each one bigger then before and each one with it’s crash on the sand comes closer to me, where I stand on the shore. Each crash and rumble brings the presence closer my toes. I want to be in it over my head I want to swim and float in the waves and watch them and hear them rumbling on the shore. As I feel the rumble getting closer I hear the questions rising: Do you really want more of me? Do you really want to take this step, cause your not going to be the same. And the truth in my heart is I don’t want to be the same. I don’t want the things of this world that have been holding me down anchor me to this shore anymore. I want to dive in. And swim as deep into his presence as I can and I want to look back at that shore that I’ve stood on for so long and bask in the freedom I’ve found in the deep seas of His presence. So do you feel it? Do you feel the rumbling in your Spirit, what is beckoning you to?

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Sacrifice

“The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure hidden in the field, which a man found and hid again; and from joy over it he goes and sells all the he has and buys the field. Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking fine pearls, and upon finding one pearl of great value, he went and sold all that he had and bought it.”

Matthew 13:45-46

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Sacrifice

Am I willing to lose my life to gain it? Am I willing to sell all I have for the one pearl, the precious jewel?

In this journey and past few weeks I have been so determined that the easy path was the best path for us. That these struggles and difficult decisions were just signs that where I wanted to be and what I wanted to be doing was where we were really supposed to be heading. But I was definitely wrong.

After so much searching and searching trying to find a place to rent that would allow pets (large dogs especially) and 6 month leases (which is pretty close to impossible near a college) we had finally found a place in our price rang in the town (Blacksburg, VA) where we wanted to move. And then yesterday happened. Anthony and our friend Derrick went to finish up painting and get the apartment move in ready when, Anthony realized how moist it was in the apartment; and at his first viewing of it there had been mold but was reassured that it was just mildew and it would be cleaned. But with further research and acknowledging the environment of the old apartment… The “mildew” growing in it that had been cleaned away closely (to close) resembled black mold… Duh duh duh…

And now we have no where to move. Our move in date being tomorrow Saturday July 6. Back to square one literally.

In these moments instead of turning to the One who makes all things work together for my good I tend to swivel to the flesh and focus on what choices we could make that would make everything sooo much easier! If we move back to Atlanta now it would be sooo easy to find an apartment ( minus the mold) it would be sooo easy to find a nanny job and Anthony already has a few people that have offered him jobs….

But seriously, yes all that would be easy, and our life wouldn’t be bad if thats what we chose. But what will we gain if we push through this and make it to the end of this “3rd” year of internship that we have felt lead to do. What new revelations and truths will we gain and what freedom will come of the trial. I know for one thing both of us are having to do a lot of trusting and growing up in this season. We have been taken care of the past 3 1/2 years of our marriage first of all by God and then by our loving friends and family who have supported our journey in this internship. But now choosing the road less traveled when the sacrifices are our own.. Having to work 2 jobs, living in place that is even more uncomfortable then where we are now, not getting to live “in town” near the aquatic center, the Kroger (I loath walmart…for the most part), not being near the church or the home groups. All of those things in the bigger picture seem so small. I can shop at walmart (it isn’t going to kill me), I can walk/exercise with a friend out here, the church and home groups are only 30 minutes away (which isn’t really that far, in Atlanta everything is 30 minutes away) and working 2 jobs with awesome people who love the Lord is a blessing, and living somewhere, somewhat uncomfortable is bearable for 6 months I can do all things through Christ! So I want to be willing to sell everything, to sacrifice what I have for the Gospel, so my husband and I can learn all we can in the last few months we are in Virginia and Dwelling Place NRV, I want to make the sacrifices (even if it offends my flesh) I want to take the road less traveled… The one that isn’t really that easy…. I want to choose Jesus over this world (isn’t that the battle I am really fighting…). And that is just what I am going to do, by the grace of God.

Salvation Moment: Send Me!

As I laid in bed last night after a night of movie watching with my hubby, I was feeling a shift in my spirit and mind. I think it was one of those salvation moments that each of us has throughout life, one of those moments that comes after much struggle and battle over an issue we just cannot seem to overcome no matter the things we “work through” or “pray through” or seek the Lord on. It is almost as if in that moment all the actions we have taken to become free get moved to the side and we quit focusing on the how to’s and formulas we’ve learned along the way to become free and we see Jesus! Jesus… It is like last night a looked past all of those things I have done to become free and I looked to Jesus and He met me where I was, and lifted me up and helped me move past this struggle, this one thing I cannot seem to get free from, this pattern of life that has developed. For years I have found rest and comfort in external things in watching TV or movies. It has almost consumed my free time for quite some time. And it has become an addiction, an idol. I make excuses to get to watch “my” shows and movies. Yesterday on a walk with Anthony we really just stepped out of my/ our routine and spent time talking and hearing each others hearts… It was so refreshing and almost was like the Lord was preparing my heart for what He has in store for me last night, I am laying in bed and I am silently deep inside of myself crying out to my Father. Jesus I want to be free of this addiction I dont want to waste my life on all these other lovers on all these other idols. And anthony puts this song on “I will go” by the Desperation Band…

It says…

I will go I will live the life

I’ll give it up for Jesus Christ

I’ll tell the world that You are God

I will go hear my battle cry

Give me wings so I can fly

And tell the world that You are God…

Here am I

Here am I

I will give all that is mine

Here am I

Here am I

Jesus come and spend my life

Here am I

Here am I

I will give all that is mine

Here am I

Here am I

Jesus come and spend my life…

“In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord, high and exalted, seated on a throne; and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him were seraphim, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling to one another:“Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty;the whole earth is full of his glory.”At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.“Woe to me!” I cried. “I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord Almighty.”Then one of the seraphim flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar. With it he touched my mouth and said, “See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for.”Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”

Its like Jesus reached down inside of me and pulled up the courage that has been laying dormant, the courage that I have not been able to feel or see and showed it to me… Look Brittney I am in you… And I found myself praying Lord ruin me, ruin my flesh for the gospel, I choose you, free me from this addiction, I choose you… Here I am send me! Send me! Lord I choose you, here I am send me!

I woke up this morning earlier then normal and instead of fighting waking up and going back to sleep and I got up and took a new step I rarely take and came and sat down to write this down. To seal what the Lord did in my hear last night, to put down in writing the work He is begging in my heart! Yesterday on our walk I told Anthony that I was ready for a new season, not just physically but also spiritually. I have been in this winter season for so long and I am ready to be in spring for quite a while. I am ready to see the seeds the Lord has planted in my heart and life come into bloom and see the fullness of what He has for me. I think today is the first day of Spring with the Lord. Thank you for Spring Daddy thank you for this new day, the new vision of You.

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Comparison

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Over the past few weeks I have been stuck in this place that for a while I could not figure out, a place that I could not with all of my strength get out of… I was getting over whelmed and beat down and finally got to the point of just giving up and checking out.

And then one day it hit me. I am living a life of comparison and I have been doing it for years now. Comparing myself to the worth and value that I see in others. How beautiful some one is, how they dress and now being in this internship the degree that others love and share the love of Christ. What a trap of the enemy. (period)

This one act that I have been carrying out for quite some time has paralyzed me and kept me in this place of not stepping up and not stepping out. Because I see some one else doing what I want to do and I think to myself “oh their doing that way better then I ever could.” and there it is I automatically disqualify myself.

The Lord has not called me to a life of comparison. He’s set me apart. I am His daughter and there are parts of me that He created that He wants me to share with the world and not hide… its almost like that song “this little light of mine” I have been letting the enemy blow out my light because he pointed out some one else’s light to me and I thought theirs was more beautiful then mine. That my light wasn’t good enough to share.

I keep falling into that trap…

It’s a lie I have constantly struggled with, being adopted the enemy came in at an early age and spoke lies into my heart to make me believe that I was not good enough, worthless… I was blessed to be raised by family that constantly spoke into me how much of a blessing I was to them and how much I was loved and I am so thankful for them and the love they have shown me and continually poured over me throughout my life… but in the moments of being alone, when the enemy knows he can try to speak lies, some of those lies were believed. And for a long time I pushed people away because I was afraid they would see how worthless I was how not good enough I was.

After being in this internship I have been able to reject those lies and break free of them… I am a daughter… a daughter of GOD! I am good enough, my worth is far above jewels… I AM ALTOGETHER BEAUTIFUL AND THERE IS NO BLEMISH IN ME….

But still, I have been comparing and now I have been comparing my walk with the Lord. This kind of comparison has got me locked down and stuck in a trap. I haven’t been motivated to pursue my relationship with Jesus I haven’t even taken the time to hear what He says about this situation because I have automatically disqualified myself because so and so is so much better then I am… well I’m just not down with that any more. Thats not what my Dad says about me…

Once again these truths ring in my ears, I hear the heart of my Father for me….

YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH, YOU ARE WORTH IT, WHAT YOU HAVE TO OFFER IS IMPORTANT AND SPECIAL ONE OF A KIND, I DO SPEAK THROUGH YOU AND MY LIGHT DOES SHINE FROM YOUR HEART, YOU ARE MY DAUGHTER!

YOU ARE ALTOGETHER BEAUTIFUL AND THERE IS NO BLEMISH IN YOU!

I hear you Daddy, I hear you.

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Faith…Where are you?

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Faith, what a word it seems so simple and easy, but having faith is at some points in life difficult. Seeing the circumstances around us in the flesh and how the world sees them as big and impossible to overcome, faith can be the furthest thing from our minds. But when we see our circumstances through the eyes of our savior He is faithful and just concerning us… In Christ faith can move mountains. During my quiet time this morning (reading Matthew) I came across Matthew 17:20

“…for truly I say to you, if you have the faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there, and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you.’”

Seriously! NOTHING will be impossible for us! In Christ all things are possible! When I come to these places where I look at what is before me and I see this HUGE mountain that I am pretty sure I cannot climb even if I tried; and some times I have tried to “climb” these mountains almost as if to prove a point that I can do it.  And I have been trying to climb these mountains on my own, so of course I cannot climb over them. But if I have the faith the size of a mustard seed I can move mountains… If I trust in the Father and have faith in Him these “huge” mountains before me will be moved!! I mean who needs to climb a mountain when you can move it! (although when you get to the top of some of these mountains the view is pretty spectacular when you have Jesus beside you). All through Matthew Jesus acknowledges people with faith, these places have stood out to me in these past few weeks. Where is my faith? I feel as though through these past few seasons my hope AND my faith have been misplaced! The Lord brought my hope to mind and I pursued that I wanted my hope to be in Him and Him alone and by His grace it will be… But now my faith is brought to mind. What have been putting my faith in? I find that I have been only putting faith in myself and what I can achieve on my own (I am woman here me roar!!…..meow) Seriously?!? Where does this proving to every one what I can achieve come from?!? My father fights for me!!! What can I achieve compared to the love of Jesus and His strength and power…. I have a victor and He is victorious and He is fighting for me! My faith should be found in Him and Him alone. And trough these moments with my Father, He is lifting me up, in love and gentleness He is bringing these places in my heart that are not His to light, I thank Him that He is and that I am not seeing them on my own where I would be condemning myself for these dark places where Jesus doesn’t dwell.

By the grace of God my faith will be found in the Rock that is Jesus, all other ground is sinking sand! Because when I have faith the size of a mustard seed… Mountains will be moved! I don’t need to roar and prove myself…”My God’s not dead He’s surely alive living on the inside ROARING LIKE A LION!” He is my roar….

 -Brittney

Where does your hope lie?

Where does your hope lie?

Where is your hope focused on? Is it focused on the future and the promise of the unknown? Or is it focused on God, the one Who has plans to prosper us and not to harm us. Is your hope a dream you have had for your entire life or is your hope the One who gives us the desires of our hearts?

“A hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life”

Proverbs 13:12 (NASB)

I have been thinking about that for the past week.  I have found my self in a place of hope deferred. I tend to look ahead, look forward to what is to come, and sometimes look forward to things that are not set in stone but things I would like to happen or ways I picture our life going. So much so that I put my hope in things that are not a guarantee  which is basically setting myself of to be disappointed… Who am I to put expectations on God’s plans for my life…WOAH now Brittney! During this time I have realized that the focus of my hope and the who of my hope has lost focus, I have been focusing on the promise of these things yet to come on what tomorrow holds.

“So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

Matthew 6:34 (NASB)

I have not been doing this. I have been planning and looking forward to what tomorrow holds instead of living each day to the fullest in what The Lord has for me in that day. I have been waiting for this BIG AHA moment, a moment of “I have arrived” I have been waiting for my life to begin. Instead of rejoicing in a new day the Lord has made I have been rejoicing the days that are still to come…

Reality check… I am alive, my life started September 24, 1987 in Athens Georgia… And God new my days before the foundations of the earth!

“Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written the days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them.”

Psalm 139:16 (NASB)

What have I been waiting for… Well I know one thing I have been waiting for is my purpose I have been grasping at any and everything that comes along that I feel will give me purpose, all except for the one thing that gives me life and purpose and that is JESUS!

“For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not for calamity to give you a future and a HOPE.”

Jeremiah 29:11 (NASB)

“The thief comes only to steal kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.”

John 10:12 (NASB)

I have been believing the lies the enemy has been whispering in my ears… That my lifes purpose is what I can do with my hands, that I will have life in big moments…. And only in big moments. The truth is that my purpose is to seek God to let Him reveal the abundant life He has for me! I am His daughter and he gives me the desires of my heart!

“Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart.”

Psalm 37:4 (NASB)

My heart aches for the truth and fullness of what hope is in the hands of my Father. His perfect love casts out fear…

“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.”

1 John 4:18 (NASB)

 and for me the fear of the unknown is huge. I plan and plan what my future and my families future will look like, to make it something comfortable instead of something unsure and unknown. The future is slightly uncomfortable for me, I want to know what is to come so I can prepare myself for it and not experience any surprises so that I can be comfortable. But the Lord has so many bigger plans and purposes for me then I can even make up for myself. His thoughts for me out number the sand!! HOLY COW! I am yet again found awestruck by His love for me. God is my comforter, He comes along side me and helps me through the tough times and rejoices with me through the good times! He is with me on the mountain tops and He is with me in the valleys, He is there with me while sowing the seeds and He is with me in the time of harvesting. He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. His love for me never ceases… If his eye is on the sparrow then I know He watches me…. He came to give me life and life abundantly, believing anything contrary to that will get me in trouble. In my weakest moments it is very hard to not to get in the flesh and to hear the enemy’s voice over the the voice of my Father. The lies he whispers are just enough to get me into a tail spin of thinking of the what if’s and shoulda, coulda, wouldas… But when I dwell on the truths I have listed and just stand firm in the words of my Heavenly father He lifts me up and helps me out of the pit. He truly is amazing!

Thank you Abba for never giving up on me! Thank you for your lovingkindness that is new ever morning! Thank you for picking me up when I fall and for holding me up when I cannot stand on my own!

I will give thanks to You!

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